pressing.

i've recently (and temporarily) given up cooking (and cleaning), choosing instead to focus my energies on fretting (and agonizing). i haven't much felt like writing, either, for the past month or so - first because i was enjoying the springtime too much and then because the aforementioned fret & agony kicked in.

old milo has developed cognitive dysfunction. i mean, he has dementia. since i haven't posted about it, i feel like it's had a really quick onset. poor thing. (me? or him? whatever.) it's a total roller coaster situation; he has his good days and his bad. thing is, his good days are still pretty bad but his bad days are not at all good. he was pacing like a lunatic initially. when that subsided a little, i worried that he was on his way out. he spent so much time sleeping and slept so soundly that i had to physically rouse him to go out. well, he's gone back to pacing a lot - which i find...encouraging?! - but now i'm losing sleep over the lack of "cold, wet" on his nose.
maybe some drugs will help, but not for a month or so. and that's after they finally arrive, since i opted for $0.17-per-pill online ordering over $1-per-pill at the corner pharmacy.

my no-cooking philosophy, which has seemed not so much a lifestyle choice as an admission of defeat, is really taking its toll. i feel like shit physically because i'm just not fueled properly. this is an unfortunate recurring cycle for me - i feel bad so i eat poorly so i feel bad, ad infinitum.
so this week i intend to snap out of my funk and start taking care to make myself feel better. lots of fresh fruit and veg and satisfying lunches packed for work every day. fortuitously, i did some testing for joanna's next yellow rose book prior to falling into the pit of nutritional despair, so i have lots of easy options to put in rotation. like...

3-bean salad with warm cumin lime vinaigrette

cabbage salad with lemon dill dressing

lemon mint pasta with zucchini and petit pois (or peas, if you shop in washington heights.)

and the worst picture of the bunch but the biggest hit amongst all the YRR testers, southern-style "chick" salad. (with grapes!)


in final news, it's a babytastic week 'round these parts. tomorrow is my little love william's first birthday (his korean "dol!") and his future girlfriend kelly finally made her appearance this week, born may 6th at 6:40 a.m. i can't wait to meet her tomorrow!